Darker Desires

Echos of 'Fidelio'

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Echos of 'Fidelio'
by Vesperae

SMOKE SIGNALS MAGAZINE - July - August 2015

This is a brief excerpt from the September–October 2010 issue of Smoke Signals magazine, and one of my first columns for the free/public version, "My First Decade at The Orgy":

Kayla's Lungs, Part 10

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Kayla's Lungs, Part 10
by Vesperae

SMOKE SIGNALS MAGAZINE - May - June 2015

First, an announcement about my forum:

Boardhost shut down my forum and multimedia archive near the end of March because they recently implemented a ban on smoking and fetish content. Way back in 2000 when I opened the first incarnation of "Sublime," I asked the then owner of Boardhost (who was pretty much a one man band at the time) if he had any problems with SF content. He told me flatly that he absolutely did not.

Oh how times change…

La Petite Mort

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La Petite Mort
by Vesperae

SMOKE SIGNALS MAGAZINE - January - February 2015

La petite mort is French for "the little death." The expression is most often used to describe the experience of having an orgasm, but is also used to describe the release of emotional energy (catharsis) that accompanies experiencing the climax of a creative expression, as well as the experience of going through a shocking life-changing event.

Current Every Day Smoker

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Current Every Day Smoker
by Vesperae

SMOKE SIGNALS MAGAZINE - November - December 2014

I have this image in my head of one of those large, sprawling, cheaply-made single-story beige/grey suburban office parks. Like the one in "Office Space."

You'd have absolutely no idea what happens inside based on the standard light box signage at the entrance to the parking lot from the county highway that the mass of pseudo-utopian architectural diarrhea is puddled next to. It'd read something like: "_(some action word or made up tech-y sounding name)_ Information Solutions." But on closer inspection, you might get a clue from the large number of air conditioning units on the roof. They're there because on the inside are a mass of giant data storage servers all networked together.

Kayla's Lungs, Part 9

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Kayla's Lungs, Part 9
by Vesperae

SMOKE SIGNALS MAGAZINE - September - October 2014

January 11, early afternoon

After I'd had some tea and journaled yesterday I decided that, between my sex-soaked bed and the accumulated items in my laundry basket, I'd better make a trip to the basement of my apartment building for some coin-operated "defunkification."

After I'd pulled on some sweats and flip flops, stripped my bed, and gathered everything up, I opened the door to my apartment and stepped into the fresh air of the hallway outside and immediately noticed the overwhelming smell of concentrated Virginia Slims tar wafting off of my skin, hair, and laundry, as well as the sweats that I was wearing.

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